Dear Professor:
If I can
taste your cologne as you walk by, you are wearing too much! If I walk into a room and know you’ve been
there…I am sure you are not achieving the purpose you intended! Do you realize you are giving people
headaches?
Dear “Dad” in Mexican Restaurant:
Maybe you don’t
know how far your voice carries. You
gossiped loudly. You harassed your
toddler with a steady stream of harsh chastisements and threats of being
spanked. When your food arrived, you prayed
loudly, right after fiercely slandering some young man behind his back. I just have no more words about this…
Dear Congregation:
Every time
I visit your church, which is not a large church, throughout the whole service,
people are running back and forth to…somewhere. Constantly. Every. Time. There are more
adults than children who can’t seem to stay in their seats. This is not normal
behavior, and for a visitor (or anyone), it’s very disruptive. I’m guessing it disturbs your preacher, as
well.
Dear Coworker:
I knew it
was you before you left the restroom because you didn’t wash your hands. Yeah, people really do remember that about you.
Dear Other Coworker:
The
co-worker who didn’t wash her hands after using the toilet just handled that
door knob. Don’t roll your eyes at me because I won’t touch the knob with my newly washed, bare hand. You shouldn’t either.
Dear Spider:
You sure
made my nice, long weekend end on a high note.
A shrill note, that is. Don’t
ever, ever dangle that close to me again…well, of course you won’t, you’re
dead. We’ll just let that serve as a warning to all future spiders who are
brave enough to venture into my house and dare to let me see them. (I’m aware of the irony of this coming from “The
Brown Recluse.”)
Dear Candidate:
I’d like to
know that you could write a short paragraph with complete sentences and proper punctuation. I feel the ability to do so is a good indication
of your overall intelligence.
Dear Reader:
Dear Reader:
At least
one of you will know why I’m asking this…where in the world is Grace,
Texas?
You only thought I was finished showing my mini-vacation pictures! Here's more of the same, only different!
You only thought I was finished showing my mini-vacation pictures! Here's more of the same, only different!
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| Muscle Shoals Sailing Club Setting sun |
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| Cheekwood Giant Ant |
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| Cheekwood Falls |
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| Natchez Trace Scenery |
I'm not the one who knows where Grace, Texas is. I must confess I googled it and nothing came up; now I'm curious. Looks like you got some great pictures for the start of A/Z for next year. I would be distracted at that church too; if one thinks they are going to have to get up, one should sit at the very back of church. Shame about that man in the restaurant; not a good example indeed.
ReplyDeletebetty
The Grace, TX mystery is solved! haha
DeleteYeah...the church thing...you would not believe the constant jumping up and down. I think it's a spirit of disturbance on that place! (not really, but my goodness!!!)
Oh My Goodness! I'm with you on all accounts. It seems rude is the new normal. :/
ReplyDeleteThe unwashed hands: Eewwwwww. I do not handle the doorknob when exiting a bathroom, either. Depending on the door, I either push it with my elbow or use a paper towel.
ReplyDeleteThe perfumed professor: eewwww. I hate that.
Tiny backsroty. I have a tiny bit of asthma. I am not the typical, inhaler carrying asthmatic. I only have trouble in smoke-filed rooms or an area with lots of dust or musty smelling attics/storage rooms. Old books are no longer my friends. But asthma fits are not a regular event for me. Probably once every couple of months or so, and it usually involves only a little wheezy, difficulty breathing.
I said that to say this: Our local grocery store hired a teenaged boy a couple of years ago who wreaked to high heaven with some totally foul smelling cologne. He was stocking shelves one day as I walked past him. Just as I passed, I took in a breath and sucked in what seemed like a bottle of cologne. I had an all out asthma attack, complete with breath intakes that sounded like geese honking rather than a delicate wheee. I almost passed out right there in the aisle.
All I could do was sputter, "cologne," as I staggered away from him. (He didn't have the sense to move.) Once I got out of heavy smell space, I had to sit down!
That has never happened before or since. Your professor friend is not a teenaged boy; he's an idiot.
Deb
Deb...I know that's not funny, having an asthma attack in the grocery store...but the geese honking kinda got me and I giggled. But, your comments always crack me up. You tell it like it is.
DeleteOH. Grace, TX. snicker. A long, long time ago, I listed my location as "Grace." I did it to keep my blog anonymous and because I thought living in GRACE needed to be my daily awareness. Blogger took it upon itself to locate Grace ind Texas.
ReplyDeleteFor reasons I do not understand, your tracker thing has picked up that location from r my long-deleted blog. I haven't had that location for years! My current location on my "About Me" ting is "Chagrin Falls, OH. Because it makes me laugh.
Haha I KNEW someone would know why I was asking! Chagrin Falls makes me laugh because it tickles me that it tickled you.
Delete